


The Forgotten Truth || ReaderxSuho (F!)

by AgentLin



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: CEO Kim Junmyeon | Suho, F/M, OT12 (EXO), Yandere
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:28:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22540261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentLin/pseuds/AgentLin
Summary: After surviving a devastating car accident you awoke with amnesia, no memory of who you were, and the only connection to your past was your husband, Suho. The CEO of the biggest pharmaceutical company in the world, who loved you to the ends of the universe, even if you didn’t remember him. You knew his love was true, cause even if you couldn’t remember, you felt your love for him in your heart. Three years later you’re as happy as you can be with him, but there’s just something that’s not right, and you’re not so sure you can figure out what.
Relationships: Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 67
Collections: R's Yandere





	1. Chapter 1

You walked along the busy streets at night, making your way through the crowds to get home. It had been a good day, and it seemed like a good night, but then you saw something and it filled you with fear. You started picking up the pace, moving faster and faster until you were running, the only sound you could hear was your racing heartbeat.

You were trying to get away from someone, or something, but all that mattered was to keep moving. With every step your vision began to blur, after all it was just a memory, and it always ended the same way. You kept moving, unable to see anything clearly, except for one thing, the light. A light that was quickly approaching, growing bigger and bigger until it engulfed everything around you, and then darkness.

♥♥♥♥♥

You woke with a jolt, panting and trying to catch your breath. That nightmare was consistent, there wasn’t really a night that it didn’t haunt you. Although it was one of the only things you had left from your past, and it wasn’t even complete. It wasn’t long after you woke up that Luhan came in, seeing your state and knowing what was the cause.

He got to your bedside, wrapping a blanket around you and leading you in some breathing exercises to help calm you down. You did it every morning, but you always felt better when he was there to help you. Once you were calm Xiumin came in with your morning tea, always making sure it was warm and soothing for your throat.

“Was it the same?” Xiu asked. “The nightmare?”

“Yes…”

“Did you remember anything new?”

“No. It still ends the same. I don’t know what scares me…”

“It’ll come back to you one day.”

“One day? It’s been three years. I just want-”

You stopped short in your words, suddenly in a coughing fit. Luhan took the tea from you so you wouldn’t spill it all over yourself, Xiu rubbing your back and handing you a tissue. You were always sick, and the two in house doctors knew it, so every morning they came prepared for anything.

“Sweetheart, I’m going to bring the car-”

Suho came into the room with a bright smile on his face, although it quickly faltered when he saw the state you were in. You looked up at him, trying to hold back the coughing.

“Maybe we should rain check on-”

“No!” You forced yourself out of bed. “No I’m fine! We can go out for breakfast. Just give me five-”

You fell to your knees, coughing again. Xiu and Luhan were both quickly by your side, helping you up and trying to get you back in bed but you shook your head. When the coughing stopped you took a breath, taking a step towards the closet only for Suho to pull you into his arms. He gently pet your head.

“Baby, what kind of husband would I be if I took you outside in this state? I’d only worsen your condition and you’d be bed ridden for days.”

You had tears in your eyes. “I’m sorry… I always ruin our dates…”

“It’s not your fault. Don’t ever apologize for things like this. Now cheer up, I’ll have Kyungsoo make you your favorite for breakfast in bed.”

“Really? Will you stay?”

“Of course I will, my morning schedule was cleared for you after all.”

You smiled, getting a forehead kiss from the man you loved. He got you back in bed, excusing himself to go place the order with the chef. While he was gone Xiu and Luhan continued with your morning check up, you were a bit sick, which was never surprising, but it seemed that it would pass in a few days. You were used to being sick actually, constantly staying home, and trying to go out on dates with Suho, but every time you made plans it never worked out. You never thought it would be a problem, but you were wrong.

Three years ago everything changed for you. All the details weren’t clear to you, but you knew you had been in a car accident. You had been running from something when you wound up on the street when you weren’t supposed to. According to Xiumin it was a miracle you had survived, but of course nothing would ever be the same. For starters you had amnesia, you couldn’t remember anything about your life before the accident, you couldn’t even remember that clearly, which Suho said was a good thing.

The other thing was your immune system. As it was explained to you, it was much easier for you to get sick now, which is why you haven’t left the house since the accident. When you woke up for the first time you were terrified, you didn’t know what was going on, or where you were. You were screaming and thrashing around until you were given a sedative. That’s when Suho came around, tears on his face, you didn’t know him and that broke his heart. He stayed with you for days, showing you pictures of the two of you on dates.

He loved you, and you could always see that in his eyes. He’d tell you all about how you met, all the things you did together. Even if you didn’t remember the feeling was there. You knew deep down that you loved him and when he could see that in your eyes he revealed the big truth, you two were actually married. You cried hearing that, moreso when he said you got married a few days before the accident.

You were both in tears as he put the ring back on your finger, sharing your first kiss since you’ve woken up. That’s also when he asked the question if you wanted to go home, which of course the answer was yes. You had actually been home the whole time, just down in the infirmary, since Suho didn’t want you freaking out, he figured waking up in a hospital like environment would make you feel safe and comfortable until you were on the same page again. It was probably weird, but then again you were his wife, he just wanted you safe while you recovered.

You were still stuck in bed for quite a few months, slowly getting back the confidence to walk around the house. It hurt to walk the halls and not remember them, but the feeling of familiarity slowly came back. Although it wasn’t long before you were back in bed with a cold. Xiumin and Luhan did well to take care of you whenever you got sick. Although looking back, you had to admit it was upsetting that you haven’t been off the estate grounds since the accident. All you could do was stare out the window and see the city skyline, a place you would probably never set foot in again.

♥♥♥♥♥

“How was that?”

“Delicious.”

You laid in bed, head resting in Suho’s lap. He was still in his suit, minus the blazer, feeding you some fruit.

“Sometimes I feel bad.”

“Bad?” Suho chuckled. “For what?”

“That Kyungsoo only cooks for us, and that other people will never get to try his food.”

“Do you want him to travel the world and open a restaurant chain?”

“Ya, I don’t know about that. I’d miss his cooking.”

“Well if it makes you feel better he always has the option to leave, so he’s here because he wants to be.”

“Loyalty.”

“Yes. Loyalty.” There was a knock at the door. “Come in.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt.” Kris stepped into the room and bowed. “But you have a meeting in an hour sir.”

“Right. It seems I have to go baby.”

“Will you be back for dinner?”

“I’m sorry, today’s gonna be a late night.”

“Oh, take it easy.”

“I will. You lil miss, should get some rest.”

“Can you stay with me until I fall asleep? I’m already pretty tired.”

“Okay okay, Kris, postponed the meeting for another half hour.”

“Yes sir.”

Kris came over to the bed and took the food tray, placing it on the cart and wheeling it out. Suho laid your head on the pillow, tucking you in and sitting besides you. Your eyes stayed on him for as long as you could, a full belly and the medicine lulling you to sleep. He waited around for a while to make sure you were asleep before leaving, kissing your head and wishing you sweet dreams.

♥♥♥♥♥

You were used to waking up alone, it was a rare threat when you didn’t, so you always cherished those moments. You felt better as you sat up, morning light still shining into the room. Since it was nice out you figured you’d continue reading outside in the gazebo. There wasn’t much to do at home besides read, or paint, or write. You didn’t have a phone, and the computer was in Suho’s study, which you rather not go into it.

The lack of technology was honestly for your own sake. He didn’t want you being tempted to look up things about the crash and trigger those memories. You did agree with him on that too, given that you were a lot happier without that information, or getting addicted to social media. As you walked outside you noticed Yixing in the garden, watering some flowers. Your eyes met and you waved, walking over to him.

“Good morning, y/n, feeling better?”

“Much. And you? How are the flowers?”

“Beautiful, but not as beautiful as you.”

You giggled. “Don’t say that. They’re much prettier than I can ever hope to be. What are you even doing here? I thought you’d be at the office with Suho.”

“I know I work for your husband, but the garden is my priority, don’t tell him that.”

“I won’t. Your secret is safe with me.”

Suho was the CEO of a big pharmaceutical company. He was very successful, having inherited the company from his father, and his father before him, it was the family business. He was busy because of it, but you can’t say you minded given the life style he provided you with, moreso after the accident. Some selfish prick would have divorced and given you up after something like that, but he kept his vows.

Some of the other house servants brought you some tea and snacks to enjoy while you were outside. You asked for a certain type of lunch, wanting to have something tasty, and to eat outside. Although even with the joys of wealth and all the time in the world it got pretty lonely sometimes. You’d past the days finding ways to keep yourself busy, when illness wouldn’t render you bed ridden. It was a miracle you never got Suho sick, but then again he wasn’t around much anyway.

After dinner you wandered into Suho’s study. You should be getting ready for bed, but you were hoping to hold out and be there for when Suho got home. He never told you his study was off limits, but you also didn’t want to accidentally mess with something, although you couldn’t help yourself this time. You sat down at his desk, thinking maybe you should ask to go with him to the office someday. Your eyes then lingered to the picture on his desk, your wedding picture.

You grabbed the frame, staring at the photo. You both looked so happy and so in love. You didn’t notice the tears sliding down your cheek. To see such a wonderful moment but not remember it. You hugged the picture, your eyes lingering to the computer. Xiumin had said that the trauma of the accident was the reason for your amnesia, and that it was probably keeping you from remembering everything else.

A part of you was tempted in the moment, to find out exactly what happened that night, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You didn’t want to cause yourself and Suho pain. The door suddenly opened and Suho walked in, on the phone, but he abruptly stopped when he noticed you at his desk. You quickly wiped away your tears, putting the picture back where it was. You wanted to rush out, so as not to bother him but he wasn’t going to have it.

“Johnny, I’ll call you back.” He hung up. “What are you doing in here? You should be in bed.”

“Nothing. Nothing, I just missed you… I need to go take a bath.”

“Baby why are you crying?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Come here.”

He pulled you into his arms and you couldn’t help but cry. He didn’t say anything, letting you use his hundred dollar suit as a tissue. He only pulled back when you started to calm down.

“What’s wrong love?”

“How can you still love me?”

“What kinda question is that?”

“I don’t remember anything. How we met, our first date, or first kiss, your proposal, our wedding day, none of it. How can you still love me when I don’t remember those important things.”

“Cause those are in the past. We’re here now, together, and have all the time in the world to make new memories. I love you, and just cause you don’t remember when the sparks flew, doesn’t mean they aren’t there. You love me, don’t you?”

“I do, I know I do.”

“And that’s all I need to know.” He kissed your cheek. “Come on, let’s get you ready for bed. Kai told me you spent your day outside reading.”

“Yeah.”

“So why don’t you tell me all about that.”

♥♥♥♥♥

“How was work?”

Half the time Suho made it home in time for dinner, he always did his best to be there. You understood he was busy, and a lot of other people were counting on him, so you couldn’t really complain. Besides, at the end of the day, he’d come home to you, and sleep with you, and that’s what mattered.

“A bit problematic with this deal that might fall through. Although I may have to go to some party in order to make things more agreeable.”

“A party? I’d love to go with you!”

“No baby, that’s too risky for you.”

“Risky?”

“You already have a weak immune system, being exposed to countless people, it’s why you’re safest at home.”

“But you could use me to play the sympat-”

“NO!” You stared down at your plate. “Y/n, I am not gonna put you in danger over something small like a business deal. You don’t need to worry about my work okay.”

“Okay… anyway, I’m sure you have work to look over after dinner so I’ll turn in early.” You got up. “Good night.”

“Y/n, I-”

You left the dining room, apologizing to Chanyeol since you bumped into him on your way out. Suho was already on his feet, ready to follow you and apologize but Chanyeol needed his attention.

“What?”

“You have a call waiting for you.”

“Tell them I’ll call back later.”

“It’s the council.”

“Of course it is. Tell the kitchen staff to prepare y/n’s favorite dessert for her, and she’s not to go to bed until she’s had it.”

“Yes sir.”

♥♥♥♥♥

“I don’t want it.” 

You stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around you, using a smaller one to dry your hair. A servant had been waiting for you, a tray with your favorite dessert in hand.

“I was told not to leave until you have it.”

“Then you’ll stay there all night.” You took the plate and set it on the nightstand. “Now go.”

“But-”

“I’ll deal with it. Please go.”

“Yes.”

You sat down in bed staring at the plate. It was Suho’s apology, but he wasn’t even here to go along with the treat. You ignored it and got dressed, not hearing Suho come in. You got scared when you saw him staring out the window, looking up at the night sky.

“The party’s tomorrow night.”

“So. I thought-”

“If you still want to go, I’d be happy to have your help.”

“The dessert didn’t cut it so you’re offering me a night out?”

“No that’s just extra. I’m just scared about getting you sick.”

“It won’t be your fault. Not like you’re sick and going to sneeze on me.” You chuckled. “I just think I’d be fun to see you work.”

“Yeah it’d be fun to have you around too. Now how about that dessert? It’s your favorite after all.”

“Only if you feed me.”

“Of course.”

♥♥♥♥♥

You were so excited over the idea of going to a party. After breakfast the next day you spent most of your morning in the closet figuring out what to wear. As the wife of a CEO you had to look incredible. Once you had the perfect outfit picked out you needed to accessorize appropriately. You had so much to choose from, it was the most fun you had in a long time.

“I’ll be out in five minutes!”

You didn’t want Suho to see you until you were fully dressed. You were blushing so hard as you got the finishing touches on. You spun around in front of the mirror, admiring your own beauty. You were about to walk in when you suddenly felt dizzy. You grabbed your head, stumbling back a few steps. You grabbed the nearest trash can and threw up, already starting to feel awful.

“Y/n are you okay? I heard-”

“I’m coming!”

You forced yourself to get up and walk out. You put on a smile for Suho and took a step towards him, only to collapse into his arms.

“Y/n! Y/n are you alright.”

You felt dizzy, but managed to stand up. Suho looked worried, like he always did when you were sick. You tried to ease his worries but felt sick again, finding another trash can to throw up in.

“Y/n-”

“I’m fine! I’m fine…”

The last part escaped your lips as a sob. You couldn’t cry, but you already felt the tears. Suho gently grabbed your hand, pulling you close to him, letting you rest your head against him. He started slow dancing with you in the silence of the room.

“You look beautiful baby.”

“I’m sorry…”

“I should apologize.”

“For what? This isn’t your fault.”

“Not that, the fact that I’m happy.”

“Happy?”

“No one else gets to see how beautiful you look tonight.” He leaned down for a kiss but you put a hand on his lips, making him laugh. “Right. That’s how stunning you are.”

“You should go…”

“We agreed to go together.”

“You have a higher chance of losing millions if you don’t go. I’ll be okay.”

“Baby-”

“Please, for me. I don’t want to hold you back. You originally planned to go without me anyway.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Just promise me… that you’ll be here in the morning?”

“I promise.” He kissed your cheek. “I’ll have Luhan come up and look you over.”

“Yeah…”

You kept a smile on your face until he was gone, then you let yourself break. You fell to your knees sobbing. You took off all the jewelry, wiping away the tears and the makeup on the dress, not caring if you ruined it. You pushed Luhan away, screaming at him to leave you alone, which he did, reluctantly, waiting until you calmed down, and invited him back in. He made no comment on your feelings, and you didn’t really listen to what he said about your health.

You had some of the servants help you out of your dress, staying in a bath so they could clean the room. You threw up two more times before you settled into bed, having some tea to settle your stomach and taking some pills. You thought you’d have some trouble falling asleep, but it was actually easy, you had probably exhausted yourself over the screaming and tears. All you could hope for was that everything would go well with Suho.

♥♥♥♥♥

“Well I have some papers to approve, so good night.”

“How about I go with you.”

“Huh?”

“You’re just going to be in your study right? I can-”

“You want to stay up? Baby I’m gonna be busy and-”

“That’s okay! I’ll just do some reading, I won’t bother you at all, I promise.”

“Alright. I’ll have two cups of tea prepared.”

You happily got your book from your room, settling down on one of the couches in Suho’s study. You’ve just been missing him a lot lately and wanted to spend more time with him. Of course this isn’t really how people do that, but it was the closest you could get. Although you were used to going to bed at a certain time so it wasn’t surprising that you fell asleep in his study and woke up the next day in bed.

“You’re up early.”

“Yeah…” You sat up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. “You’re still here.”

“Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah… I just don’t remember falling asleep.”

“You scared me a bit when you slouched over, but you had just fallen asleep. I tucked you in, but surely falling asleep on a couch isn’t comfortable.”

“Sorry… I wasn’t that tired…”

“It’s okay. It was nice having you around, although maybe it’s best you just go to sleep at your usual time.”

“No. If I stay up with you I can get used to being up later. It’d be nice to go to bed together.”

“If you say so.”

That’s how it started, you just wanted to spend more time with him since it was clear going out with him was practically an impossibility. Although it never seemed to work out, every night you’d be with him in his study only to fall asleep and wake up alone in bed the next morning. You thought maybe he was right, that your body was in the habit of falling asleep at a certain time, but then you started thinking that maybe it was something else.

One day while you were out reading you were having your tea. You were pulled away from the book when you tasted the tea. You pondered over its taste for a while, taking another sip. You made your way to the kitchen, asking one of the servants if the tea she prepared was the same one Suho would drink with you at night, she said it was, so its different taste was very strange. You figured maybe you were sick again and your taste buds were off, so you didn’t think too much about that, not until it came up again.

You woke up in the middle of the night screaming. You couldn’t hold back tears as you were shaking in fear. Suho wrapped his arms around you, not caring to be up, holding you until you calmed down. He was comforting, and you felt safe in his arms. Although you didn’t want to go back to sleep, a little too scared, and even Suho couldn’t help you with that, so he had the kitchen get you something to help you sleep. You didn’t think too much about it, that is until you tried the tea.

“Is something wrong?”

“Um…” You took another sip. “This is supposed to help me sleep?”

“Yeah. It’s mixed with some sleeping pill. So you can fall asleep in my arms.”

“That sounds nice.”

Suho watched you drink, and you knew you had to finish every drop. Even if it tasted a lot like the tea you had earlier in his study. You didn’t comment on it, just laying back down and letting him cuddle you. A familiar drowsiness overtook you and you fell asleep, waking up alone, tears in your eyes. You didn’t want to believe that he was drugging your tea at night, after all, could you really trust your taste buds since you were always on and off with being sick.

“Here you are.”

“Oh I’m good, I don’t want any tea tonight.”

“Is everything okay?” Suho asked.

“Yeah. Just not in the mood for tea tonight.”

“Then how about some snacks, something a little more filling.”

“That sounds nice.”

You regretted saying that when you passed out and woke up the next morning in bed. So it wasn’t just the tea, it was whatever he could get you to consume. Despite everything you still wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, so you tried something else the next night.

“What will it be today then? Tea or snacks.”

“Neither.”

“Huh?”

“Dinner was good, so I’m not hungry. So I’m good for tonight.”

“Are you sure? It’s not such a good idea to stay up late without midnight snacking you know.”

“Maybe some other time.”

“Are you really going to make me eat alone? I-”

You slammed the book shut. As he kept trying to push something tears built up. He just needed to drug you with something and he was gonna make up any excuse he needed to. You stood up, sniffling a bit.

“You know, I’m actually feeling tired, so I’ll go to bed.”

“Y/n, why are you crying?” He stood up. “Did I-”

“No, it’s just… the book… I read something really sad just now and I don’t want to continue it. I’ll see you tomorrow, good night.”

You kept yourself together until you got to the bedroom, curling up in bed and sobbing. You didn’t understand at first, but it was clear that he just didn’t want you around. It was finally dawning on you just how little time he spent with his wife, and how the house was more of a prison. You couldn’t stay, not when you felt so unwanted. The next morning, after barely eating anything for breakfast, you got dressed, and headed downstairs.

“Good morning, y/n.”

“Morning, Baekhyun. Do you know when Suho will be home?”

“You know he’ll be home by dinner.”

“Perfect.”

He gave you a weird look but you just moved past him. Everything seemed fine, that is until you opened the front door and walked out. You took a deep breath as you felt the morning breeze in your face. You walked down the stairs, heading for the gates. You heard someone yell your name behind you but you ignored them, determined to go out today.

“Y/n!” Baekhyun grabbed your arm and turned you around. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m going-” 

You stared at Baek, confused, your eyes slowly glancing down at the needle jammed in your side. You grabbed his hand and took the needle from him, he was clearly at a loss for words as well, not knowing how to explain himself.

“Y/n-”

You jabbed the needle into his neck and shoved him away, starting to feel dizzy. Despite that you kept moving towards the gate, only taking a few steps before you fell to your knees. You were freaking out, trying to get back up, but only collapsing onto your back. You stared up at the blue sky before your vision started to go black. You vaguely saw Chen and Xiumin standing over you before you passed out.

♥♥♥♥♥

You jolted awake, a minor headache being realized. Luhan was there when you woke up, trying to get you to stay in bed but you didn’t care to listen to him.

“Y/n, plea-”

“Back off!”

“Y/n!”

You had to admit you were surprised to see Suho. You didn’t think he’d care to come home. He was concerned, you could see it in his eyes, but all you did was glare at him.

“What were you doing?”

“Going out! What does it look like I was doing!”

“Why?”

“Cause I fucken wanted to!”

“What if you-”

“Then you can pick me up at the nearest hospital!”

You got up, ignoring the drowsiness and planning to leave the room. Suho grabbed your arm and tried to pull you close but you slapped him, stunning him.

“Don’t fucken touch me!”

It was quiet and you pulled your arm free from him, rubbing your arm. After a moment he seemed to calm down, looking at you.

“What has gotten into you?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s all those drugs you’ve been feeding me!”

“What are-”

“Don’t! Don’t fucken play coy here! I just pulled a needle out of me!”

“And stabbed Baekhyun with it!”

“He’s fine isn’t he?” It was quiet. “I’m leaving.”

“Y/n-”

“I don’t wanna hear it.” You had been trying to hold back tears, but you were cracking. “I don’t… I don’t want any excuse from you…”

“Baby-”

“Why am I here?”

“What?”

“I don’t have anything to offer you. I’m not from a wealthy family, I don’t have any property to my name, I don’t own a company, I’m not famous, I have nothing to give you. All I have is you, but you don’t even want me around.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were feeling like this?”

“Cause you’re never around anymore! I thought maybe staying up late with you in your study would be nice, maybe we could talk… but you didn’t want me… you drugged the tea, or the snacks… why couldn’t you just say it? That you don’t love me anymore!”

“That’s not true.”

“Are you sure? Cause that’s all I’m getting. Fuck, I couldn’t even set foot out the door without one of your guys drugging me. That’s not love.”

“You could get deadly ill out-”

“I don’t care! I just wanted to be with you but you can’t give me the time of day. It hurts me… every time we make plans to go out and I get sick, looking back, I think it’s a sign. We don’t go out anymore, maybe that’s because we’re not supposed to be together. I’ve been stuck in this house for three years, and you don’t make any effort to be with me, here or out there. It’s like you don’t want the world to know I exist! That I’m your wife and…” You wiped away the tears and took a deep breath. “You know I haven’t seen… or spoken to my family and friends since the accident. I think I’ll call them up, find a place to spend the night and… call a divorce lawyer in the morning.”

“Y/n, you can’t-”

“I’m done. I’m done waiting at home for someone who doesn’t love me.”

You went for the door again, hand on the doorknob when Suho came up behind you and hugged you. The tears fell from your eyes and you couldn’t help but grab his arms. You wouldn’t look at him though, keeping your gaze on the ground.

“Please don’t… nothing you can say is going to change my mind.”

“I know, you’ve always been stubborn like that, but I need you to hear me say, I love you more than you know.”

“That’s not-”

Suho turned you around and pinned you against the door, putting a rag over your mouth. Your eyes went wide and you tried to fight him, but he had always been stronger than you. Now the tears weren’t of heartbreak, but fear. You felt your strength slipping away, the world fading to black around you.

“Sh, it’s going to be alright, you’re going to fine baby, I’ll do better, I promise.”

Everything eventually turned to black and you slumped down. Suho picked you up into his arms, making sure you were unconscious.

“Tao! Sehun!” The boys rushed in. “Take her to Xiu, the last two weeks.”

“Two weeks?”

“Yes. Now go, I have some calls to make, and tell him I want it done tonight.”

“Yes sir.”

♥♥♥♥♥

You opened your eyes only to shut them tight, the light making uncomfortable. You heard some voices but you couldn’t make anything out. You slowly managed to get your eyes open again only to see an oxygen mask placed on your face. You tried to move, feeling that your arms and legs were restrained, something cold against your head.

The air you were breathing seemed funny, and you started giggling a bit. You tried looking around, but everything was a blur. You could vaguely make out two figures, but your attention was quickly pulled to a light that was approaching you. It made you scream and you found the strength to thrash around and pull on your restraints. You felt the prick of a needle in your arm and calmed down, drifting back into sleep.

♥♥♥♥♥

You felt a hand gently running through your hair and you slowly opened your eyes. You were snuggled up in bed, Suho laying next to you, watching you. When you opened your eyes he smiled, moving closer to kiss you.

“Good morning, how are you feeling?”

“Okay… a little fuzzy in the head…”

“That’s good. I’ve been worried.”

“Why?”

“You’ve been in and out of consciousness for the last two weeks. Came down with a bad fever, you had trouble keeping food down, but you seem much better now.”

“I feel better… what time is it? Shouldn’t you be at work?”

“I took the day off. Xiumin and Luhan said you’d be better today, so I wanted to be here with you.”

You blushed. “Then what are we doing? I wouldn’t mind staying in bed all day.”

“That sounds lovely… although I was hoping we could go out and enjoy a meal together.”

“Really?!”

“Yeah. You’ve been stuck in bed for too long, and it’s been even longer since we went out on a proper date. What do you say?”

“Yes! A million times yes.”

“Alright, get dressed okay, and don’t rush, we have all day.”

You kissed Suho and happily got out of bed, already planning out what to wear. Suho watched you go, a soft smile on his lips. He got up, checking his phone and getting ready himself. He had everything planned, so there shouldn’t be anything to worry about. You didn’t remember the last time you had been in a limo, but you were excited to get in one again. You wanted to roll the windows down but Suho said you could get sick, and that if you were spotted, paparatize would be quick to follow.

The restaurant was big and beautiful, a place Suho had reservations too, one he’s had for weeks. You were a bit nervous about sitting by the window, given what was mentioned in the limo, but Suho told you the place was known for its privacy, the windows were one way, so you could look out without having to worry about being seen. The view was just as incredible as the food. It was as if Soo followed you guys out on your date.

“Maybe I can get the chef to make you you’re favorite for dessert.”

“Oh no, that’s not necessary. I don’t need you to flex for me here.”

“What’s the point of having a rich CEO boyfriend if I can’t use my power for you. Come on, it’s our first date in a long time.”

“No one can make it like Kyungsoo, I can’t trust another chef with such an important task. And no don’t call him to come over here.”

“Alright, alright.” He chuckled. “I won’t, as long as you’re happy.”

“I’m very happy, thank you.”

“I’m just glad we’re together.”

“Me too.”

As you were getting ready to go Suho’s phone rang, it was work, and even if it was his day off he needed to answer it. He had Sehun and Tao take you back to the limo, since they had come along as security for you and him, along with Kris, but he was Suho’s personal bodyguard. He stayed behind to take the call, sitting back down.”

“Hello… yeah… hold on a second.” He put his hand over the phone. “Quiet!”

The restaurant suddenly got quiet, everyone stopped talking and looking over at Suho, waiting, not daring to make any kind of move.

“Thank you.” He returned to the call. “You were saying?”

When he finished the call he stood, Kris approaching him.

“Tell Kyungsoo to get home immediately and make some dessert for y/n. As for the rest of you…” He looked around at all the other supposed customers. “Thank you for your time, please, finish your meal and then you’ll receive the rest of your payment. Good day.”

♥♥♥♥♥

“Did you have a good time?”

“The best!”

You laughed as Suho picked you up and spun you around, putting you back down and peppering your face with kisses.

“How about I tell our master chef to make you a proper dessert. The perfect end to a perfect date.”

“Only if you spoon feed me.”

“Anything for my beautiful baby.” You giggled. “Now go wash up, I’d hate for you to get sick cause of our date.”

“Okay, okay, maybe Luhan can give me something just in case.”

“Lovely, now go, so I can go to the kitchen.”

You kissed him and made your way upstairs. You went into the bathroom, deciding to get the makeup off, you weren’t going to go out again, so there was no point to have it around while home. You were about to head down when you noticed something red on the floor. You knelt down to find a journal hidden under the sink. It was strange, so you opened it up, seeing that it was mostly blank, although there were a few things written in the first few pages. There was a date on the first page, it was from a week ago, and the handwriting seemed to be yours. You read the first sentence and your eyes went wide.

_“Suho’s been drugging me.”_

You kept reading, there wasn’t much, but there didn’t need to be. All it talked about was what happened two weeks ago, the nights you had apparently tried staying up late with Suho only to be drugged to sleep. It didn’t make sense, none of it made sense. You looked around for a pen, finding one and deciding to compare the handwriting just to make sure, writing down the date first.

_“I don’t remember any of this.”_

It was your handwriting, you couldn’t deny that as you kept writing, jotting down what Suho had told you, about being sick for two weeks and not really being conscious or aware of yourself at the time. You stared at the pages, at the words written down on them, at the things you had apparently experienced.

“Y/n?”

Suho’s knock on the door scared you, and you instinctively held the journal close to you. The door was locked, so all he could do was knock, so you were still alone, for the most part.

“Are you okay? You’ve been in there for a while.”

“Yeah. I’m fine. Just wondering if you’re deserving of seeing my smile.”

“Oh come on, don’t keep that from me.”

“Is dessert ready?”

“Almost.”

“Good. I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Don’t keep me waiting too long.”

“I won’t.”

You stared back at the journal, not knowing what to do. If Suho saw this how would he react, would he be angry, or maybe he’d just laugh. Maybe you wrote this while you were in and out of conscious, when you couldn’t process or remember anything. Then again your handwriting was too neat for that. Your eyes lingered on the last entry the other you had made, wondering what to believe.

_“I need to leave him. For my own sake, for my own safety.”_


	2. Chapter 2

You sat in the bathtub early one morning, door locked and barricaded, just in case. You already had breakfast so you didn’t have to worry about being bothered over that. You didn’t check or write in the journal daily. Although when you felt sick you definitely made it a point to check on it, and you always found a new entry. It scared you to see those, knowing you wrote them but not remember doing so, or experience the event. 

♥♥♥♥♥

_ “Suho came home pissed tonight.” _

__ You had been on your way down to greet Suho when you heard him screaming over the phone. You stayed out of sight, deciding to retreat to the bedroom and not bother him for fear of making things worse. His work could be stressful, and you knew he wouldn’t want to take it out on you. Although you ate alone at the dinner table. You hoped he was alright, but you just went to bed without seeing him. It was late when he woke you up though.

“Suho…”

“Hey baby, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Are you ok… you seemed…” You yawned. “Upset… earlier…”

“Yeah, something went wrong, but I’ll fix it.”

“Wanna talk about it…”

“I don’t want to bore you with the details.”

Suho pulled you up into his lap, your arms lazily wrapped around him. You weren’t fully awake, snuggling against him, even though he was still dressed. You figured he just wanted to hold you for a while given that he hasn’t seen you all day, but would eventually get ready for bed. As you were dozing off you felt his lips on your neck, making you giggle.

“Suho…”

“Yeah baby?”

“It’s late…”

“And? I’ve missed my pretty wife.”

“I bet you have…”

“I’ve missed you a lot.”

“Hm…”

He laid you down in bed, getting you out of your shirt. You didn’t say much, still sleepy, but as he kissed down your chest you began to wake up. You watched him for a while, his hands caressing you softly, reaching over to feel your breasts.

“Suho… I’m not-.”

“Shut up.”

“Hm?”

“It’s been a long day baby, so just enjoy it.”

“But it’s-”

“I said be quiet.”

Suho moved up and kissed you, his tongue pushing past your lips. You kissed back, enjoying the attention, but certainly not in the mood for anything more. You pushed him away from you after the kiss, sitting up.

“Maybe tomorrow okay, I’m tired and-”

“I told you to stop talking.”

He pushed you back down and got off the bed. You were a bit shocked, moreso by the harsh tone he took. He opened one of the dresser drawers, grabbing a small cloth and bottle of something. He poured a bit of liquid on the cloth and came back to bed. You were a bit uneasy, pulling your legs up.

“Suho… what’s that…”

“Just something to help you relax.”

“What?”

“It’s been a long day and right now I need you to help me out.”

“I… I get… okay… I will… you don’t need-”

You tried to get out of bed but he caught your leg and pulled you back despite your screams. He shoved the cloth in your face, keeping it there as you struggled and tried to hold your breath.

“If you would have listened to me we wouldn’t be here right now.”

You tried but ultimately you wound up taking in the drug. You expected to fall asleep which would have horrified you, but instead you felt the opposite. You grabbed Suho, starting to feel really hot. He smiled at your reaction, throwing the cloth to the ground and moving down to get your pants off.

“Much better baby.”

You became rather dizzy and lost in the feeling of him, but you enjoyed it, even if he was unusually rough that night. You were far more tired than you started out by the time he was done with you, and you were sore as well. You felt awful, and gross after everything, looking at Suho with disbelief. He had gotten out of bed, startin to dress himself. Although out of everything you felt, so used the strength you had and ran to the bathroom. He didn’t notice until it was too late.

You locked yourself in the bathroom, his pounding on the door terrifying. You scrambled for the journal, writing in a bit of a hurry over what had just happened. He was always such a gentleman, so you still had trouble believing what you just experienced, then you wondered if it had happened before. Just the idea made you feel worse, and you stared at the door, tears streaming down your face.

“Y/n, get out here right now!” You didn’t answer, sobbing. “Y/n! Goddamn it, where are the keys.”

You started to panic a bit, but you knew you couldn’t fight him. You wrote down some more things before putting the journal back in it’s hiding spot. You could hear keys outside the door, hiding and curling up in the tub. You expected to see Suho bust in, but instead Kris and Chanyeol came in and grabbed you. They dragged you out screaming, that is until Suho slapped you across the face. You quickly grew quiet.

“Baby it’s so late.” Suho grabbed your face, wiping away the tears. “Why do you have to make so much noise?”

“Suho…”

“Sh, you’ll be fine.”

“Suho! Suho!”

You tried to get free but it was no use. You screamed for Suho, this side of him terrifying you, but there wasn’t anything you could do. You eventually stopped screaming and went quiet in defeat being taken to some unknown part of the house to you. Although something felt familiar about it and dreadful all at once.

♥♥♥♥♥

You threw the journal away, hugging your knees. You couldn’t believe your husband would do such a thing, but it scared you to wonder just what else he had done that you didn’t remember. Once you calmed down you grabbed the journal and wrote in an entry, you remembered that day, when he came home upset, but all you knew was that you went to sleep. Although thinking back now, you had woken up sore, but you figured you had just slept wrong. It honestly just became hard to be in that house.

You had grown scared of Suho, knowing that the kindness he showed you wasn’t completely real, and that even you weren’t exempt from his darkness. Besides him of course you were scared of the food you ate. Maybe once you knew how to cook, but you didn’t remember, and Kyungsoo would probably find some way to get you out of the kitchen if you lingered too long. You couldn’t even trust yourself anymore. If you ever felt sick, you couldn’t help but wonder if it was normal, or he did something to you.

You got sick on your own at times but there were sometimes where, actually many times, that you being sick messed up something for the two of you. Now you even started faking being ill just to avoid Suho and others around the house. You didn’t know who you could trust, you didn’t know how many secrets were being kept from you or why you were even around. You always wanted to be alone, you just felt better that way, but your actions would eventually be noticed, and that would raise suspicion, which wasn’t good.

“Sweetheart?”

You jumped up when Suho snuck up on you, quickly on your feet, book on the floor. You had found the library to be the best place to self isolate. The servants rarely came by, and you were rarely found too, so it was a win win, but also made it so you didn’t have your guard up. When Suho found you he practically scared you to death, you didn’t even know how he managed to be so quiet.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“I’m fine…” You grabbed your book. “What are you… you’re home early…”

“Yeah, it was a slow day so I thought I’d surprise you, I guess I took it too far.”

“That’s very kind of you. I guess I should dress into something more presentable. I’ll be right back.”

You tried to rush past him, your words a bit jumbled, but he grabbed your arm. You felt your heart racing, afraid he was going to do something, but you calmed yourself down.

“You don’t have to change, but I do wanna talk.”

“Talk? Is everything okay?”

“I’m not sure.”

He gently pulled you back and had you sit. He sat across from you, quiet at first and you had to mentally remind yourself to be calm.

“Is everything okay with you?”

“Me? I’m fine… haven’t been sick in a while.”

“I’ve been worried about you. You’ve been distant lately, hiding in the library.”

“Oh…”

“What’s wrong, you can tell me anything.”

This situation sent chills up your spine. You’ve had this conversation before, a more aggressive version, and that didn’t end well on your side. He knew what was wrong, so maybe this time around he was trying to do things differently. Either way you needed to be careful, if you said something wrong, who knew what he’d do. You were on thin ice.

“I… well… it feels suffocating… to be in this house all day… I miss you like crazy but… you’re busy with work and I get that… I just don’t know what to do sometimes… your job is important and I can’t make you choose… that would be selfish of me…”

“Baby…”

He got up and pulled you into a hug. You started crying, not out of sadness, but scared that what you said was wrong and upset him. Thankfully all he did was rub your back.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t realize I was being so distant lately.”

“It’s okay…”

“No, no it’s not. You’re my wife and I can’t even give you the time of day. I want to be better… but I’ll admit I don’t know how.”

“You’re already great… just the way you are…”

You were both quiet for a while, Suho pulling away and kneeling down, wiping away your tears. You put on a smile, telling yourself you were going to be just fine, even if you weren’t completely sure. He didn’t seem upset with you, moreso himself.

“I have an idea.”

“Hm?”

“Why don’t we have a party?”

“What?”

“I know, I know, we’ve never had one before, but I’ll be very careful.”

“But… but why?”

“A big social event… you can help plan every detail, so something to keep busy and look forward to. I’ll make it a company thing so it’ll be a big help to me too.”

“A party? For me?”

“Yeah, it’s been so long since you’ve been to one. You won’t be in any danger, I promise.”

“Are you… are you sure? You don’t have to just to make me feel better.”

“I want to, and it’s a lovely excuse to have you all dressed up. Are you okay with that? If you don’t want to we don’t have to.”

“No… no I would love to have a party.”

You had to admit the idea was exciting, it’s been so long since you’ve been to one, and you didn’t remember going to such an extravagant event. It would be fun, but it also seemed like a good time to get out. A party meant Suho and his people would be distracted and you could use that. Of course you had to take the planning seriously, there was nothing wrong with having fun before your escape.

♥♥♥♥♥

It was a bit funny considering how busy you became. You were certain you had never organized a party like that before but you had plenty of help and it wasn’t too hard. You got to pick the food, decorations, music, a part of you hated how much you enjoyed this, but were also sad you wouldn’t stick around to see it through.

There was going to be a lot of people, or at least you assumed considering the guest list Suho gave you. Most of his people will be working as security, so you figured the best way out would be through the back and you would need time. The plan was to mingle, enjoy dinner, but afterwards to retire to bed. Everyone would think you were asleep so no one would be looking out for you. The only other problem you faced was where you would go, but it’d probably be easier to figure out once you were there.

As you finished doing your makeup, you stared at yourself. You looked really pretty and you started to wonder if that was the last time you were going to look that way. You were gonna miss the life of luxury, you couldn’t deny that. Maybe a divorce could work out in your favor, but honestly you just wanted to get away, even if it left you penniless.

“Look at you, as stunning as ever.”

You laughed. “Well you know, that’s how I was born.”

“Is it? Well aren’t I lucky. A little upset a bunch of other people will see you like this.”

“But I’m already married to the handsomest man in the world, so I’m the lucky one, and you don’t need to worry.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Alright, now where is the beautiful necklace that will adorn your neck? Close your eyes, I’ll put it on for you.”

“Thank you.”

You smiled up at him and closed your eyes. He was really sweet when he wanted to be. You heard him grab the necklace you had picked out for the night, taking a breath when you felt the cold against your skin. You were waiting for him to finish and tell you to open your eyes, instead you felt a small prick.

“Careful, my skin is expensive you know.”

“My bad baby, I just want tonight to be a good one.”

“Me… me too…”

You started feeling a bit dizzy and opened your eyes. You felt like everything was moving slowly, and some sounds were incredibly loud. You heard something clang on the table and managed to look down, seeing an empty needle. You could barely register it before Suho grabbed your chin and had you look up at him.

“You look gorgeous.”

“Thank… thank you…”

You smiled with a small chuckle. He kissed your head and helped you to your feet. You leaned against him, eyes somewhat glossed over.

“Tonight’s going to be lovely isn’t it?”

“Hm…”

“I thought as much, don’t want you stressing out, just have fun.”

“Okay…”

He wasn’t so subtle with making you compliant for the night, and you never thought he’d do such a thing. You should have been more alert, but you also wondered if he was on to you. Either way, you became arm candy for Suho that night. You were very happy, and no one seemed to pick up on the slight high behaviour you had, or they didn’t care. Actually, you didn’t know the type of people Suho worked with or what he told them about you.

At dinner Suho was having serious conversations with his guests, but you weren’t there enough to pick up on anything. You did greet some of the guests and they were just as polite but you were really just there to not be excluded, guess it was easier to be drugged up at the party than in bed. You were enjoying yourself, but you were pretty sure that was the drugs. The food was good, you had picked it after all, and the atmosphere was nice, but it quickly changed.

Security kept their distance, even Suho’s personal guards, so as to not make anyone uncomfortable. So having Kris walk into the dining room, it just meant trouble. He leaned over and whispered into Suho’s ear, which quickly dropped his mood. He kept calm and told his guard to wait a minute. You were actually chatting with someone when Suho pulled your attention towards him.

“It’s getting late sweetheart, I think it’s past your bedtime.”

“What? Since when do I have a bedtime?”

“Just a joke silly, but I think you should get to bed. The rest of us gotta talk about things in private.”

“Okay… when will you come to bed?”

“Not sure, but I’ll be there in the morning, promise.”

“Okay.”

“Thank you baby.” He kissed your head. “Kris will go with you, make sure you get to bed fine.”

You got up, stumbling a bit. You had been allowed to have some alcohol, so that didn’t work well with what you had already been given. You weren’t drunk but you probably seemed a bit tipsy. You made your way upstairs to the bedroom, Kris close by to make sure you didn’t fall. When you got to the room you assured him you could take it from there and he left you.

Even in your tipsy state you managed to get your jewelry and makeup off. You took a moment though to write in the journal, a few tears staining the page. Regardless of your plan, things didn’t go your way, but you had to remember that Suho drugged you so nonchalantly, making it clear he didn’t have a problem with treating you that way. It certainly made you want to get away all the more.

After hiding the journal again you slipped out of the dress and you flopped down in bed. You lazily pulled up the blanket, snuggling the sheets. At least you had some fun, your original idea of escape having left your mind long ago. Now would have been a good time too, but there was no way you could sneak out in that state so it was easier to just fall asleep and try again some other time.

♥♥♥♥♥

You expected to wake up in the morning, Suho by your side, so it was strange to wake up in a different situation. You slowly open your eyes to see some stranger shaking you. As you sat up you rubbed the sleep from your eyes, it was probably a staff member.

“What’s going on? Where’s Suho?”

“Y/n... is it really you?”

“Hm?”

Before you could take another look this person was hugging you tight. That certainly helped you wake up but you stayed still, eventually pushing them away.

“Who-”

“I can’t believe it’s you!” He grabbed your head. “I thought… we need to leave, now.”

“What?”

“Come on.”

“I… who are you? How did you get in here?”

He wasn’t listening, more in a panic and getting you out of bed. Even though you were alert and scared, you were still tired, the drugs not out of your system properly just yet. Regardless of this escape attempt, you wouldn’t just go with a stranger. You pulled away, curling up in bed.

“Who are you?!”

“What? Y/n it’s me, Johnny, look we need to go.”

“I don’t know you.”

“Please-”

When he tried to grab you again you screamed and fell out of bed. That definitely made him panic, but what was done was done. After a moment Chen came into the room, he was concerned, but upon seeing the intruder he called for security. Chanyeol and Tao rushed into the room, grabbing this Johnny guy. 

“Ya! What the hell! Let me go! What’s going on here!” Johnny yelled. “Why is she here! Why is y/n here! She’s supposed to be dead! What are you doing!”

“What?” You got up. “What are you… let him go!”

“Y/n please.” Chen grabbed your arm. “Don’t listen-”

“Shut up! What is he talking about?”

You couldn’t get any answer as Johnny was quickly gagged and dragged out of the room. You knew you wouldn’t be able to follow, but you needed answers. Chen hadn’t come empty handed, you noticed him going through his bag getting a sedative. It made you panic so you ran to the bathroom and locked yourself in. He didn’t bang on the door but he was asking you to come out.

You only had so much time before he thought to get the keys, so you needed to be fast. You grabbed the journal and quickly started writing about Johnny, that he seemed to know you, but you were a bit shaken up writing the last bit. He said you were supposed to be dead, he was so happy to see you too, but you didn’t know anything else, you had no idea who he was. You couldn’t forget him.

“Y/n please, I know that was scary but you’re going to be fine. Can you please come out before Suho finds out. You’re not gonna get hurt.”

You knew that was a lie, but you couldn’t be too much of a rebel this time around. You finished up your entry and hid the journal, leaning against the door.

“Who was that guy?” You had to play the part. “I thought he was a guest or something.”

“Just come out, I can give you something to help relax your nerves.”

“Okay…”

You unlocked the door and walked out, keeping up with the scared factor. Chen had a calming face and you sat down in bed. You wanted to ask questions, but you just let him sedate you. As you passed out you noticed Suho walking into the room with Kris but all you could do was close your eyes.

♥♥♥♥♥

_ “Don’t forget Johnny.” _

You stared at those words, the end of your last journal entry. All you remember from the party was going to bed, writing about the failed escape. Although besides the unknown savior the other part also stuck out, that you were supposed to be dead. You hugged the journal with tears in your eyes. If that was true, so many things would start to make sense in a new light. You didn’t want to think about that right now though.

When you finally left the bathroom you remembered how late it was. You had been stuck in bed all day, apparently hungover, but given what you just read, you weren’t sure that was the case. Despite your better judgement you went out to find Suho, going to his study. You knocked before letting yourself in, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, as well as the tears. Suho moved away from his computer.

“Hey baby, what’s wrong? Can’t sleep?”

“I’m having trouble… sorry to bother you…”

“No it’s okay, come here, I’ll get you some tea.”

You sat down in his lap, leaning against him. You glanced over at his desktop, seeing a picture of Suho with three other people, you recognized one to be Kris, but didn’t know the other two. Suho had wrapped his arms around you, playing with some of your hair.

“Who are they?” You asked. “The people in the picture? And why aren’t I your desktop?”

He chuckled. “I have a picture of you on my desk, and I can always see that one.”

“Hm…”

“They’re friends, love. You know Kris, this guy over here is Minho and this one… Johnny.”

“Oh…” You had to stay calm. “How come I’ve never met the other two?”

“It’s complicated… but if things go well I’ll finish the picture.”

“Hm?” He mumbled that last part. “What did you say?”

“Nothing. Let’s get you to bed.”

You took one last glance at the guy named Johnny. Even though you didn’t remember him, you felt that this guy was the same one, he felt familiar. Suho picked you up in his arms and took you to bed, a while later Luhan coming in with some tea. You took a breath, knowing all too well how this was going to go. You drank the tea and Suho tucked you in. All you could think about as you fade to black was Johnny. You wondered what he was like, and you wondered, you hoped, he could help you.


	3. Chapter 3

“What the fuck is going on here!”

Johnny squirmed in his chair, having been tied up and left in the dark room. A single light shined down from above, and beyond it he could only see darkness. He knew it was dangerous to go to Suho’s mansion, but he had a job to do. Of course it all went to hell when he found you. His world came crashing down and all he wanted now was answers.

“Why is y/n here! How is she alive!” Johnny was screaming his voice hoarse. “I was at her funeral Suho! As were you! What did you fucken do!”

“Did she recognize you?”

Johnny looked around frantically, but he couldn’t make anyone out. It was just a voice, Suho’s voice. He had to be around somewhere given his voice wasn’t coming over a speaker.

“What?”

“Did y/n recognize you when she saw you?”

“I… no?”

“Exactly.” Suho stepped into the light. “She doesn’t remember anything before the accident.”

“What does that-”

“I was hoping she’d recover her memories, but she hasn’t, and it’s unlikely she ever will.”

“Can you please make some fucken sense already?!”

“I didn’t want to give you false hope!” Suho sighed. “Given her relationship with me, and the attention from the press, I knew she’d be in danger. I faked her death to keep her safe, but it was supposed to be temporary. When she woke, she had no memories, and she hasn’t recovered them since. I always planned to tell you, but I didn’t want you to see her until she remembered you. When it became clear she wouldn’t… I didn’t want you to see her as a shell of her former self, I thought it’d be too painful for you to lose your best friend all over again.”

“This whole time… you’ve let me blame you for her death… when you had her hidden from me! From the world!”

“She’s not the same Johnny, a lot has changed.”

“Like what? Why are you keeping her hidden?”

“You know what kinda work I’m involved in. If the world knew she was alive, that she was vulnerable, she’d be in danger, you know that. Besides she’s not as strong as she used to be.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Her immune system for starters, it’s fragile. Even with my power I can’t take her out much for the sake of her own health. Furthermore, her memory… for the most part it’s intact but even now she’ll forget things. Your surprise visit earlier, she might not remember it. She’s not really the same person either of us knew anymore.”

“But she’s alive…”

“I’m sorry, I never wanted you to find out like this.”

“I want to see her.”

“I can’t let you do that.”

“Why not!”

“She doesn’t know who you are. She doesn’t meet new people, and surely she’d be scared of you.”

“Suho!”

“I’m also scared.”

“Of what?”

“I… I don’t want her to remember her past, the accident. I don’t want her to be afraid. She’s happy the way she is, and you’re a big part of her past, you might trigger her memories.”

“Suho please…”

“We were friends once too, I would like us to be again. If you truly want to be a part of her life again, things will have to be different. They’ll have to be my way, so I’ll give you time to think about it. I’m sure we’d both like to have you back around.”

♥♥♥♥♥

Johnny was left in solitude again, but only for a while. Eventually he was freed and escorted home. A lot changed when he met Suho, he thought it changed for the better, but looking back, things only ever got worse. Growing up, it wasn’t an easy life for Johnny or you, but you always stuck by one another. Despite all the trouble, you were best friends, and you made it out together.

“What do you think?”

You cheered excitedly as you opened the door to your new apartment. It certainly wasn’t in brand new condition but it was new to you, it was yours and it made you happy. Johnny knew better than to think you’d be upset. You both had been working hard to save up money for a place, and this was what you got.

“It could use some work if I’m being honest.”

“Obviously, but we can do that together!” You checked out the apartment. “Can you believe we have our own place!”

“Nope, I’ll go get the boxes.”

“I’ll be down in a minute.”

Truth was Johnny mostly paid for the place, he just lied to you about the price. He learned pretty early on what he needed to do to make money and get out, get you out of that neighborhood. It was also his only real way of keeping you safe. The first night you guys ordered out and slept on the floor, at least you did. Johnny snuck out to keep his promises. Things would get better, he trusted that, but it would come at a price. He wasn’t associated with any group in particular, figured it was easier to just be a gun for hire.

“Where do you work again?”

“I’m a mechanic, I fix things.”

“Oh, like cars.”

“Yeah, among other things.”

“Cool, that also explains the late nights and you coming home dirty.”

“Ya, I don’t make a mess at home.”

“You clean up after yourself, I appreciate it.”

This wasn’t what Johnny wanted to do forever. As he stayed in the business he got better, he was more known, and the jobs would get more dangerous. He had to take them, he had a reputation to keep, but he also grew weary. If something went wrong he could return home seriously injured, then again he might not go home at all. He couldn’t leave you alone, so he knew he needed to get out, but he was good, so it wasn’t going to be easy.

“J… Johnny…”

“Hm?”

“I… I won’t be able to… to pay my half of the rent… just this month, I promise…”

“What ha-”

Johnny looked up to see you hiding your face in the shadows. He got up and walked over but you merely backed away trying to avoid making eye contact. When Johnny grabbed your arm he flipped you around and saw your face, the busted lip and bruises. He was furious to say the least.

“Who did this?”

“It’s nothing…”

“Y/n, someone hit you! Who did this? What happened?”

“Nothing…”

“Y/n!”

You started sobbing. “I… I just got fired and… and tripped on my way out…”

“Why didn’t you-”

“Cause it’s nothing, just a stupid accident. I’ll get another job soon, I’m just gonna miss this month’s rent… you can handle it right?”

“Yes, yes of course, but that doesn’t change-”

“Please let it go.”

“Then tell me exactly how you fell that would cause these kinda bruises.”

“I just fell… look I can take care of myself, so just… handle the rent this month, and I’ll pay it next month.”

You didn’t want to hear anymore from Johnny and retreated to your room. You thought he wouldn’t hear you crying, but he did, and it hurt. In his line of work, he could tell when an injury was man made, and he had a pretty good idea who the culprit was. Ever since you had moved to that apartment, and even before, you worked in a fast food restaurant. He had heard you complain about your manager before, so he had a pretty good idea who was to blame, and who he needed to beat.

“Hey…” Johnny knocked on your door. “Y/n?”

“I said I’m fine.”

“I know, I just… I made you a sandwich, figured you’d be hungry.”

You opened the door, Johnny flashing you a smile while he held a plate up to you. He made good sandwiches so you took it and sat down in bed.

“Can I at least treat your wounds? I never knew you could be so clumsy.”

“Sure…”

He got the medkit, cleaning you up as best as he knew, feeling a bit guilty when you bit the sandwich and winced. He should have gotten you something that wouldn’t be so harsh on the busted lip. When he put the medkit back he got you a drink.

“Here, to wash down the sandwich.”

“Thanks.”

“Take a day or two before you go job hunting, please.”

“I can do that.”

“Good.”

“Are you working tonight?”

“Yeah, it’s an easy job so I won’t be gone long.”

You yawned. “That’s good.”

“I see someone’s sleepy.” He chuckled. “Get some sleep.”

“Okay…”

You gave him a droopy smile before falling back in bed. Johnny took the cup from your hand before you spilled it, taking it and the empty plate. He dumped the rest of your drink in the sink, washing the cup. It wasn’t the first time he had slipped you something, but he never meant it in a bad way. There were times when he knew he’d be out late, or that things were going to get messy. He felt better knowing you were at home sleeping and that you wouldn’t catch him coming home covered in blood.

For the most part he’d give you it later, but he had something else he needed to do as well that day. Before leaving he tucked you into bed. It was no surprise he scoped out your old job, he’d been by before, so he didn’t have to wait long before he had a chance to be alone with his target. All he wanted to do was keep you safe, and make sure you had a better life than your childhood, no one would ruin that, he wouldn’t allow it.

After that he met up with the people he was working for that night. It was a simple collection night for a gang, they just needed some extra muscle. Overall the job should have been easy but there was a reason why this gang needed the extra muscle. Things went south pretty fast and bullets were flying. All Johnny needed to do was survive, that way he’d get paid, but more importantly go home to you. The problem was that this wasn’t a gang war, it was a takeover.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Johnny had to bail when he realized how bad things were getting. He wasn’t gonna die for someone else. As he ran he thought he had gotten out, but to his surprise he was cornered and outnumbered. He was disarmed and forced on his knees, waiting around for someone. That was the first time he met Suho. A man in a suit, greatly out of place in a gang war, was to be feared. Johnny knew that the small gangs he worked for were childs play, there were big boss in the city who ran more than a few streets.

“So… who do you work for?”

“I don’t work for anyone.” Johnny spit out some blood. “Just a gun for hire. I have no beef with you, I get paid to shoot.”

“Indeed, but you didn’t answer my question. Who do you work for.”

“I said no one.”

“That’s not true, everyone works for someone, or something. A parent works to provide for their family, a junkie works to feed their habit. I would like an answer to my question, since I’d rather not go looking for it myself.”

“…”

“Alright then, Johnny, right? You can stay with me tonight while my men figure out what makes you tick.”

“What do you want!”

“I told you.”

“And what happens if I answer your question?”

“Then I can make my lovely little proposition.”

“What?”

“Sorry, you haven’t done step one.”

“Do I get to go… if I answer…”

“Of course.”

“My friend… my best friend… we grew up together in a shit neighborhood, we got out together… I want to look after them so they have a good life… a better one… I work… to take care of them…”

“I see, very noble.”

“What do you want?”

“I’ve heard about you Johnny, gun for hire, a very good one.”

“So?”

“I want to… hire you.”

“Me? And who the hell are you?”

“That’s not important right now, but what my offer is. I’m not some street gang member, I’m much more powerful. You have potential, I’d like you to join me full time. So think about it, I’ll be in touch.”

Johnny was released from his restraints, the men retreating, along with their boss. Once he was good he got back on his feet, and made his way home. He took the long way around, knowing he had to be careful to not be followed or anything like that. Thankfully he wasn’t too injured so he didn’t stumble home. He went to the kitchen to clean up, and that’s when he heard the soft cries.

“Y/n?”

He went to your room to find you crying in your sleep, caught in a nightmare, and it was his fault. He ran to his room for a shot of adrenaline and rushed back to you, jabbing the needle into your heart. Your eyes shot open and you screamed, Johnny pulling you into his arms, rubbing your back. You were shaking.

“I wanna… I wanna go home…”

“This is home.”

“No… no it’s not… it’s not safe…”

“Y/n look at me, look at where you are. It’s our home, you’re safe here.”

“Home… why are you wet?”

“Oh, I had an accident while fixing up a car, didn’t watch my head.”

“I’ll help you clean up.”

“No, it’s ok, I can take-”

“I’m not going back to sleep.”

You got out of bed and left the room. Johnny ran through his head the possible lie he could use, quickly getting up and taking your bed sheet, throwing it in the washing machine. He found you in the kitchen with the medkit, eyes still puffy from the tears.

“Are you okay?”

“Just a bad dream… I forgot where I was… come one sit, I’ll patch you up.”

“You know I can do it myself.”

“Sit.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Johnny was tired to say the least, but he knew you wouldn’t want to go to sleep, and he didn’t want you to be alone. He put on your favorite movie, and you both stayed up watching it, but he was grateful you eventually dozed up and fell asleep next to him. He didn’t want to wake you so he laid you down on the couch and put a blanket over you. While you slept he took a shower to clean himself up properly, getting your clean sheet back onto your bed. You were absolutely staying home that day.

“Johnny?”

You slowly woke up on the couch, wondering where your friend was. As you were about to call for him again you heard a knock at the door. You got out of bed and went to answer it, still drowsy from sleep.

“Hello.” You yawned. “Can I help you?”

You finally took a good look at the person in front of you, and your eyes went wide. It was a man, dressed in a nice suit, an expensive one from the looks of it. He was out of place in the building, in the neighborhood, so you could only wonder why he was there. Although what really caught you off guard was the way he was looking at you. He was speechless, and he seemed smitten by you.

“What’s your name?”

“Um…”

Johnny had heard the knocking as well, but he was only in briefs and didn’t want to rush out indecently. You two lived together but you didn’t walk around the apartment half naked, you were just friends after all. He finally rushed out to a horror. You had opened the door, and the man who had offered him a job was standing before you. His eyes went wide and he pulled you back before you could answer his question.

“He’s a friend of mine, mechanic stuff, will you excuse us?”

“Oh, yeah, sure. It was nice meeting you.”

You shyly bowed and scurried off to your room. Johnny was relieved, then stepped out of the apartment with the man.

“What the hell? Did you follow me?”

“No, your weapon had a tracker. You never mentioned you had a girlfriend.”

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

“Ah, so is this the friend you mentioned? Interesting.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I made my offer, and I said I’d give you some time to think. Now time’s up.”

“That’s not enough time, I was busy with something else last-”

“Then the choice is simple, you work for me.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“My proposition last night was merely a courtesy, the choice is made. I don’t want to have a rough start to our relationship, so be a good boy and do as you’re told. I can get you and your friend into a nice place in the city by the end of the week. Tell her I’ve hired you to be my personal mechanic and pay you handsomely to work for me and only me. This is not a threat Johnny, I want to help you get to a better place, you and your friend. Make the right decision, I’ll send someone to you tomorrow with details. I look forward to our relationship.”

“So then what’s your name?”

“Suho. I’ll see you soon Johnny boy.”

Things started off bad, then they got good, and then it went to hell. Johnny didn’t know what he was agreeing to, what he had gotten himself into, what he dragged you into. He thought he failed horribly when he lost you, but now here you were, alive. Maybe you weren’t the same, but that doesn’t change the fact he has a second chance. Johnny picked his phone, calling a number he hadn’t used in years.

“Suho… it’s Johnny, I’ll follow your lead. Whatever rules you have, I’ll listen, just let me be in y/n’s life.”

♥♥♥♥♥

Whenever you had time to yourself you’d think about this Johnny guy. You don’t know if the one you saw that night was this old friend of Suho’s. It could just be a coincidence, but you had no way of knowing. No one in the house had that name, and you never really met any of Suho’s friends. If this person could help you, it was possible they’d never get the chance too.

Then again maybe they could help, they knew something about you that you didn’t even know until recently. You were supposed to be dead. So that accident, to the world you didn’t survive, but the truth was you did. Suho certainly had the means of keeping your survival a secret, but you just couldn’t understand why he would do that. You knew going out was bad for your health, so you wouldn’t, and you don’t, try to leave. Then again considering your journal, Suho certainly had another side to him you didn’t know about, and he had his ways of making sure you wouldn’t find out, or remember.

“Ah, there you are.”

“Hi Baekhyun… did you need something?”

“I’m just delivering a message. Suho is having a guest for dinner tonight.”

“So I’ll miss him tonight…”

“No, no, he wanted to make sure you washed up. You’re expected to be present.”

“I am?”

“Yes.”

“Oh… well I better… yeah.”

“Someone will come collect you for dinner.”

“Thanks.”

You never had dinner with Suho and a friend of his before, so you weren’t sure what the occasion was. There were times when Suho had a guest and you stayed locked up in the bedroom, but this was a first. You weren’t sure why he’d want you to meet someone, considering everything else he kept from you, so you had to stay on guard. You dressed normally, since you didn’t really know if there was a certain way to dress for a guest, it was just a normal dinner as far as you knew. Kris came by to get you and escorted you to the dining hall.

‘“Y/n, you look beautiful.” Suho stood when you entered. “It’d like to introduce you to my friend-”

“Johnny!”

It got quiet when you blurted out the name. You were excited, but then you noticed Suho’s look. He wasn’t happy, and maybe you shouldn’t have been so blunt or maybe you weren’t supposed to know that. Although Johnny seemed glad that you knew his name. Your cheeks went red and you looked down.

“Sorry… I just… isn’t he Johnny? Your friend from the picture you showed me the other day?”

“Ah, right.” Suho seemed relieved. “I’m glad you remember. This is Johnny, a close friend of mine that I wanted you to meet.”

“It’s very nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure’s all mine.”

“Things must be going well if you’re around.”

“Johnny just returned from abroad actually.” Suho said. “He’ll be helping me out personally with some things, so you’ll be seeing more of him.”

“That sounds nice.”

“Excuse me.” Kris walked in. “There’s a call for you, Suho.”

“Is it urgent?”

“I wouldn’t be interrupting if it wasn’t.”

“I see. I’ll be back in a moment.”

With Suho gone it was kinda awkward in the room. He didn’t know what to say, and neither did you, although there was something. If this guy was the Johnny in your journal then you had to know, or at least see if he could help.

“Um… Johnny…”

“Hm?”

“Did we… did we meet before… the accident?”

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean.”

“Did you know me before… I don’t remember anything prior to the accident… I’m just wondering if we were friends or something…”

“I’m sorry. Suho told me about you before that incident but I never had the pleasure of meeting you till now. My condolences.”

“I’m not dead…”

“I meant for your memories. Although the news reported your chances of survival were slim, many didn’t think you’d survive. I guess you’re a fighter, aren’t you?”

“Very much so.”

You two were strangers, but there was something about him. He felt familiar to you, like you could trust him, but that could just be your desperation. You couldn’t be rash, so you just needed to be patient. You had time, and some hope, so that should be good enough, at least for now. You smiled.

“Sorry… I don’t get to interact with many people for the sake of my health.”

“Yes, Suho informed me. I’ll keep my distance and be careful around you.”

“Thank you. I look forward to getting to know you.”

“As do I.”


	4. Chapter 4

You stared at your journal, the last entry about the stranger who broke into your room, and you couldn’t help but think of Johnny. His sudden appearance in Suho’s life, along with what happened that night, deep down you just felt like this was connected. Johnny denied knowing you but something told you that was a lie. You couldn’t explain it, but you needed to know more before you made any sort of decision.

After the initial introduction you saw more of Johnny around the house. He seemed very close to Suho, which certainly added to your confusion. Regardless it was nice to see him, you felt comfortable and safe around him. You got to know each other a bit but as he said, he was careful around you because of your health. It was nice to have someone else to talk to that you didn’t see on the daily. And he was a very welcomed guest at your birthday party.

Previous years just had you with Suho and a big dinner party, but the more social atmosphere you had been in lately allowed for an actual party. Of course the guests were mostly Suho’s close associates, no one you really knew. It dawned on you again you hadn’t talked to any of your family or friends since the accident, perhaps today would be a good day to reach out. There weren’t any phones around the house, the only one you knew of was in Suho’s office, so maybe later you can sneak away for a minute. As you walked around you saw Johnny in the crowd and went over to greet him.

“Hello, I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t wanna miss your birthday.”

There was something in his eyes but you couldn’t quite make it out. He seemed regretful about something, and sad, mixed with this defeated joy. It’s when you got glimpses like this of him that you just knew there was something he wasn’t telling you.

“You know, Suho told me you’re an old friend. I never got to meet you till now, what is it that you do for him?”

“I… I’m his mechanic, I fix things for him.”

“Oh, I didn’t know… I didn’t know he had a mechanic…”

“Yeah, he found me, it was a generous offer, how could I refuse.”

“Suho can be like that… he takes what he wants…”

“I know. My life would be very different if not for him.”

“Me too.”

“There you are!” Suho came to your side. “I’ve been looking all over for you, it’s time for cake.”

“Cake! Perfect, I wanted something sweet.”

“You’re already plenty sweet.”

“I’m gonna puke.” Johnny commented. “Stop being weird.”

“You’re just jealous, get a girlfriend dude.”

“Sure.”

“Come on, cake time.”

Suho led you over to the table, cake already there and the candles lit. The whole room began to sing, and for once you could enjoy one of the big parties Suho had. As expected, the cake was delicious, only the best came from Kyungsoo’s kitchen. A while after cake and dessert the party started to dwindle down. Suho was obviously going to stay up for a bit with friends, and you had completely forgotten about your phone call, now it was too late.

So instead you stuck around and decided to open your presents. Given the kind of friends Suho had, the gifts you’d get would certainly be expensive. Although amongst the pile you noticed a small bag, and it drew your attention. Inside was a little box, and when you opened that up you found a snowglobe. You smiled, the little thing bringing you joy, but all of a sudden you felt pain. Tears streamed down your face, and you didn’t know where this ache had come from. You looked at the bag and found the tag that said the gift was from Johnny.

“Y/n?”

You jumped a bit when you heard Suho’s voice. You felt embarrassed and tried wiping away your tears as well as trying to calm down. Although you couldn’t hide your face for long as Suho grabbed you and pulled you close. He could see the snowglobe in your hands, and took note of who the present was from as well.

“Why are you crying?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Y/n.”

“I’m-”

“Y/n!”

“I don’t know! I don’t…”

“Goddamn it.”

Suho pushed you back, taking the snowglobe from your hands and throwing it across the room. It shattered into pieces and you began to cry harder.

“I knew it was a bad idea to let him back into your life. He’d cause trouble whether he meant it or not.”

“What… what are you talking about?”

“Nothing, come on, let’s go.”

“Wa… where?”

“I said let’s go.”

You tried to move away but Suho grabbed your arm and started you dragging you down the call. You continued crying, begging him to let you go and explain. You were scared, even though you weren’t entirely sure why. He took you to the basement, and you remembered the infirmary down there. It was a place of healing but it gave you a bad feeling, and you pulled harder against Suho’s grasp.

“Suho…”

“It’s okay love, you’ll be just fine.”

“Why are we here.”

“I’m just gonna make the pain go away.”

“What?”

“Trust me.”

“No… no Suho let me go.”

“Don’t be like this.”

“Suho! Suho please!”

“You’ll be okay.”

While down there you noticed Luhan and Xiumin approaching, Luhan with a needle in hand. You wanted to run but Suho pulled you close, wrapping his arms around you, holding you in place. You screamed, but he just hushed you.

“Please don’t be scared, I’m just taking care of you.”

“Let me go!”

You feel the needle go into your arm, screaming again, trying to escape, but you were already feeling tired. All you could really do was cry, try to piece it all together. You hated the familiar feeling this all gave you. There was a vague idea in your head where all this would go but of course, you wouldn’t remember.

♥♥♥♥♥

When you woke in bed a minor headache was present. You noticed the medicine on the night stand along with a note from Suho, but you just had an uneasy feeling in your stomach. By now you recognized the symptoms of your amnesia episodes. You rolled out of bed and forced yourself up, stumbling to the bathroom and locking the door. You grabbed your journal and started to write about the last thing you remembered, but then the tears came again.

You were halfway through the journal, and you didn’t know how much longer you could live like this. To anyone you were happily married, even you believed it, but all this evidence. Something dark was hidden behind the smiles and kisses, that fear was eating you alive. You were better off when you didn’t know anything, just lived in ignorant bliss believing your husband was the best man alive. Lately you’ve just been going in circles around the problem and couldn’t find a way out.

That wasn’t entirely true though. There was a way out for you, but it didn’t guarantee you’d be alright in the end. You couldn’t live off this false hope, you needed to do something to save yourself, or at least stop playing pretend. You decided then that the next chance you had, you’d take it, no matter the outcome. When you saw Suho next you smiled and kissed him, crying in the back of your head, you had to keep playing, just for a little longer.

♥♥♥♥♥

“Enjoying food is always best with friends.”

Days later, after you break down and recovery, Johnny was over for lunch. Him and Suho needed to talk business as usual and you were allowed to join. You were in the middle of dessert when Suho got a call and excused himself for a moment, leaving you alone with Johnny.

“It’s nice to see you.” You said. “Been a while.”

“I suppose it has.”

“You know… I haven’t known you for that long… but I feel like I can trust you.”

“I’ve got one of those faces.”

“Yeah… you know I’ve been stuck… and I just need… release… even if I’m wrong.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t follow.”

“I have a journal… it’s hidden in my bedroom bathroom behind the sink. I’d appreciate it if you found it, and did whatever you need to with the information.”

“Does Suho-”

“No, it’s my private journal…”

Suho returned moments later and the previous conversation disappeared into the air. You stayed outside to tend to the garden while Suho and Johnny went to the office to continue talking. While you were alone more tears fell, but at least you could use them to water the plants. You took a leap of faith with Johnny, you didn’t know what he was going to do, but either way you felt this burden off your chest, and for once you could breath. It didn’t matter if you’d end up punished, you just needed the cycle to end.

After dinner you prepared for bed, knowing Suho wouldn’t join you. Before you knew he was busy with work and missed him, now you were kinda relieved. There was comfort in the loneliness, safety even. You brushed your teeth and decided to do something you were dreading. You grabbed your journal and opened it up. When you got to the last entry you couldn’t help but cry once again. Written in someone else’s handwriting was a message, and of course it could only have come from Johnny.

_ “Hold On.” _


	5. Chapter 5

You didn’t notice the tears until they hit the pages of the journal. A feeling of hope was blooming inside you, the hope that you’d actually get out of this house and be free. Your fingers traced over his handwriting, somewhat afraid you were hallucinating, but seeing a bit of ink smudge, you could let yourself have hope. Now it felt like you were actually getting somewhere, and that you actually had a chance to live.

Although, despite the great news, you still had to play the role of the clueless wife. Suho couldn’t know about your team up, or the plan to escape. It was going to suck to pretend, but you didn’t have to suffer indefinitely, just for a while longer. Yet you knew it was going to be hard to act like Johnny is just your husband’s friend, and not the person who was going to help you get out of this nightmare. Still, you could do it, you could smile through the fear.

For your own sake, and to not mess anything up, you tried to distance yourself from Johnny without seeming suspicious. Suho seemed rather happy with your lack of interest in his friend, and you didn’t know what to make of that. But whenever he came by, you always made a note to check your journal at night, but there wasn’t a new message. At least you could see his other message, and remind yourself to be patient. It eventually paid off one night.

_ “Suho is going to host one in a few days, and that’s our chance. I’ll approach you when you’re clear, and I want you to sneak into the garage, don’t wear anything too obvious, I’ll meet you down there. Just hold on a little longer.” _

__ Words couldn’t describe what you were feeling, in fact, you were probably feeling a mix of everything. The plan was vague, but you figured he couldn’t just write all the details down for you. Regardless, you trusted him, and that’s what matters most. Eventually Suho mentioned the party, asking if it was alright, and you agreed. You didn’t need to do much, but you were ready, and anxiously waiting for that night. 

It seemed like everything would go well, but a perfect escape was too much to hope for. The night before the party Suho had come home early, wanting to spend the night with you. It was actually good, he made you smile, acted like a loving husband, for a moment you could forget the reality of your relationship. Of course the moment couldn’t last, it was hard to think Suho ever did something without another motive. As you were getting ready for bed he came up from behind and hugged you, pressing his lips to your cheek.

“Tonight was fun.”

“Yeah… yeah it was…”

“I wanted us to have fun together since tomorrow I’ll probably be busy with guests.”

“But it’ll benefit you, right?”

“Of course, I have to keep my wife happy.”

“You don’t need money for that.”

“I know.” He chuckled. “I’m sorry I haven’t been around much lately.”

“It’s okay, you’re busy, and tonight was lovely.”

“True, I just worry about you. I leave you alone for so long, with your own thoughts… things can happen…”

“Like what?”

“Bad things…”

“Hm?”

“It’s better to be cautious.”

“What?”

“Just get in bed.”

He playfully laid you down, kissing your neck, his previous mumbling gone from your mind. It seemed like he was going to keep the night interesting, but then he stepped away. You were chuckling, until you heard him rummaging in a drawer and you realized what that meant. Panic began to surface, but you couldn’t react, if you did, it would only make matters worse. You shut your eyes, forcing a smile on your face, dreading what came next. 

♥♥♥♥♥

You were touching up your makeup for the night, a few of Suho’s guests already present. All the recent parties were quiet enjoyable, getting to pretend that everything was normal, that you weren’t stuck at home all the time. When you were ready you went down and joined the party, socializing with the guests. It wasn’t long before the place was lively with conversation, and eventually you ran into Johnny.

“Hey, I’m glad you could make it.”

“Yeah. It’s busy enough that we can… move forward.”

“Huh?”

“The thing… tell Suho you’re turning in early, that you don’t feel well and then-”

“What are you talking about?”

“Do you… shit… he messed with your head…”

“He… what…”

Johnny pulled you aside. “I know about your journal.”

“You… you do…”

“You told me a few days ago… Suho must have reset your memory…”

“You… you know… what… what he-”

“Yes. We don’t have much time, what I just told you, it needs to be done now. Go read your journal, please we need to do this now.”

“I… I… yeah, yeah okay…”

You were still processing, but you felt like you could trust him. He knew about the journal, which meant you told him or he found out. It was possible this was a set up, but given that Suho recently messed with you, it felt unlikely. You looked around for Suho, slowly approaching him and telling him you didn’t feel so good and were going to turn in early. He seemed to believe you, and gave you a good night kiss.

You went back to your room, rushing into the bathroom to look at your journal. You saw Johnny’s messages, even though you didn’t remember seeing them before, they made you happy. Now that you had confirmation of trust you followed his instructions. You quickly undressed, getting into something less conspicuous. Given the party, most staff and security were busy monitoring the event, so you shouldn’t be caught sneaking down to the garage.

When you got down there you didn’t see anyone around, and you were too scared to call out, so you just hid and waited. A while later you heard someone coming down, and then heard Johnny’s voice, whispering your name. You peeked out of your hiding spot and confirmed that he was alone. You then rushed over to him and hugged him tight, tears on your face. He was startled at first but then hugged you back, understanding your emotions.

“Thank you… thank you so much…”

“Hey, don’t thank me yet, we still need to get you off the property.”

“So…” You stepped back and wiped away your tears. “What happens next?” 

“I need you to trust me.”

“I do.”

“Okay.”

Johnny leads you over to a car and opens the trunk, revealing a few things. He grabbed a small case, revealing a needle. You swallowed nervously.

“It’s a sedative.”

“I know…” 

“I’m… I’m going to need you to get in the trunk… and I’m going to gag you as well…”

“I… I see…”

“You do trust me, right?”

“I do… and at this point I don’t have a choice.”

You got into the trunk, letting Johnny give you the sedative. He laid you down, making sure you were comfortable, gagging you.

“Just stay calm, and when you get out of here, ask for Taeyong.”

“What about… what about the cameras…”

“It’s taken care of, you just rest.”

“Thanks…”

The sedative was kicking in, but you focused on his voice, nodding slowly. He stayed with you, waiting until you passed out before shutting the trunk. This was a crazy plan, but he needed everything to work out, for his sake and yours.

♥♥♥♥♥

In the morning Johnny woke up to a crashing noise. He grabbed the gun under his pillow and went out to find the intruder, only to be quickly disarmed and pinned to the ground. Men had stormed into his place, starting to turn the place inside out. After a moment Suho came into his field of vision, aiming a gun at his head.

“Where is she?”

“Huh?”

“Where is y/n! What did you do with her!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about!”

“Don’t lie to me!”

“What happened! What are you accusing me of?!”

Suho hit him with the gun, and then had his men pick him up and sit him down on the couch. The place was quickly a mess, but Johnny wasn’t going to complain. It wasn’t long before Suho was informed that you weren’t there, that no one else was.

“Fuck!”

“What happened, Suho? Where’s y/n?”

“I don’t know…”

“What happened!”

“She’s gone.”

“And you think I had something to do with it?”

“You’re the one who tried to get her out of the house before!”

“That was before! She doesn’t technically exist! And her immune system is compromised. Why would I take her away from the one place she’s safe and looked after? I thought we were on better terms now, but I can understand why I’m your first suspect.”

“If she’s not here, and you didn’t do this, then where the hell is she.”

“Seriously? You’re the one who’s been having parties, letting all kinds of people, dangerous people, into your home that y/n doesn’t know.”

“I never thought any of them would be ballsy enough to do something like this.”

“You still have enemies man, just cause they kiss your ass doesn’t mean they don’t hate you. Has there been a ransom note or something?”

“No.”

“What about your security system?”

“Compromised, it happened during the party.”

“So this was planned… you need to investigate everyone on your guest list. Only so many people know who y/n really is, and if they don’t, they’ll find out soon. Does she take medication or something?”

“What?”

“Her immune system, you said she gets sick often, is she on any medication? How long do we have before she gets ill?”

“She doesn’t take medication. She should be okay as long as she’s not exposed to any illness.”

“Well, we’ve already wasted time here.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Let’s just find her, cause I’m not losing her again.”

♥♥♥♥♥

As you came to, you felt movement, so you were still in the trunk of a car. It certainly wasn’t comfortable, but you couldn’t do anything but hope to get out soon. With no sense of time, you didn’t know how long you had been in there, or even where you could possibly be. You felt the car slow down and come to a stop. When the trunk was opened you were blinded by light, but you were grabbed and pulled out.

Once your eyes adjusted you could see that you were in some warehouse. There were no windows so you didn’t know the time of day. The real issue though was that you didn’t recognize any of the men who were there with you. One of them removed the gag, checking to see if you were alright. You did trust Johnny, but not having him around didn’t help you relax.

“Who… who are?”

“Friends. Do you feel nauseous?”

“I… I… Taeyong… I was told to ask for Taeyong…”

“He’ll be here in a bit.”

“Who is he?”

“Our leader.”

“Leader? Of what?”

“I guess Johnny didn’t tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“That he runs with NCT.”

“NCT?”

“You don’t… you don’t know who we are? You’re Suho’s wife though.”

“He… he keeps me away from his work…”

“Well… we have a lot to talk about.”


	6. Chapter 6

“Johnny actually works for us.”

You were wrapped up in a blanket, warm drink in hand, listening to the explanation. The men had all introduced themselves, but you were still a bit out of it as the drugs wore off. You had been moved from the garage and into a more home-like place within the warehouse, resting on a couch. Doyoung sat across from you, talking softly and slowly as you regained your senses.

“His friendship with Suho is just his cover.”

“For what… are you some undercover police force? Is Suho doing something illegal?”

“Well… what do you know about Suho? And his business?”

“He’s the CEO of a pharmaceutical company. He inherited it from his late father, and worked his way up to run it.” 

“That’s not all he runs.”

“What?”

“Suho… how do I explain this…”

“He’s the head bitch in charge.” Jaehyun interrupted. “He runs organized crime in this city.”

“He… he what?”

“Daddy didn’t just give him a company, but a whole criminal empire.”

“And it’s time for a change.” Sicheng added. “His family has been in power for too long.”

“I… I don’t… where’s Johnny? Where is he?”

“He won’t be around for a while.” Another man, who you later learned was Taeyong, walked in at that moment. “In order to maintain his cover, he needs to stay away.”

“His cover? You said he works for you… but who are you?”

“Suho may run this city, but his family isn’t the only one in a position of power. My family, NCT, as I like to call it, also owns part of this city. We tend to run the docks, deciding what goes in and out, but your husband gets final say on everything that happens.”

“He’s not my husband…”

“True. So I don’t suppose you know anything of value in regards to his business practices?”

“No… he kept me out of all his business affairs… said I didn’t need to worry about his work.”

“Makes sense.”

“So… what is it that you want?”

“Change. Suho’s family has been in charge for generations. It’s never really been a problem, but many families don’t quite like Suho as the current leader. We plan to take him down from the inside, but things got a little complicated when you were found.”

“I haven’t thanked you for that… I appreciate the rescue, even if I can’t help you…”

“You’re a friend of Johnny’s, and he’s a friend of ours, it was only right to help you, especially given your circumstances.”

“I’m… Johnny’s my friend?”

“You really don’t remember anything? Do you?”

“I… I don’t… after the accident… I lost all my memories… and I’ve gone back and forth with being sick for the last three years… do you guys… you have medicine right? I haven’t been outside the house in a long time…”

“We have medication if you need it, but you can rest easy. This is one of our safe houses, unbeknownst to Suho, and he has no idea we have you. You’re safe.”

“Thank you…”

♥♥♥♥♥

“This is fucken bullshit!”

It wasn’t surprising how anxious and distraught Suho got in your absence. Despite everything you were his anchor, the only good thing in his life, and to lose you so suddenly, it was unacceptable.

“Her medication is going to wear off, and she’s gonna get extremely sick. Moreso if she’s being kept as a prisoner!”

“Suho, you need to focus.”

“On what?”

“I know she’s gone. I’m pissed too, but you need to be rational. This isn’t just about her, in fact it probably isn’t at all.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This is about you. Have you forgotten who you are? You still have fucken enemies, and this, your behaviour, what do you think will happen if any of the families see you like this?”

Suho scoffed. “They’d dare to question my leadership.”

“Exactly. Only a handful of people knew you had a wife, and given the lengths you’ve gone through to protect her, there’s no doubt in anyone’s mind that you love her. You need to think, this is an attack on you. So who wants you gone, who has the means to do this?”

“Oh Johnny, you’ve been out of the loop for a long time. Everyone at the table wants me gone, that’s always been the case. When you have power, there will always be those who want to take it. Every family is a suspect.”

“Perhaps, but you have to keep in mind that whoever did this was at your party. We need to pinpoint a culprit, and climb the ladder. Someone could have been hired to take her.”

“I’m already having Sehun look over the security system, see if they can trace a hacker. The two of us, we can examine the guest list. Now I know you’re with me, but I can’t just throw you out as a suspect.”

“Nor should you. I want y/n back home just as much as you do, but given that I spoke with her last night, I hate the idea that I could have been used in her kidnapping.”

“Regardless of who did this, some petty asshole, or a member of a family, they’re dead.”

“I’ll fire the gun.”

“Will you now? Sounds like old times.”

“Yeah… I came back to make amends… and found you were just… taking care of her this whole time… sparing me the pain… I can’t lose her again Suho… I won’t…”

“Then stick with me, and we’ll find her.”

“We have to find her.”

“We will.”

♥♥♥♥♥

Since you would be staying in that safe house, you were shown around when you were up for it, knowing you were going to get very familiar with the place. Even if it was technically a warehouse, it was pretty comfortable, even the bed was soft. Most of the boys had other matters to attend to, so you were left with Doyoung and Haechan.

“So what…” You were shy. “What happened to me… Johnny said I was supposed to be dead…”

“It’s… well it’s complicated.” Doyoung began. “Are you sure you wanna talk about this now?”

“I need to know…”

“Okay. You said you remembered the accident, right?”

“Yeah… the nightmare haunts me.”

“Well, it was pretty bad, and you were rushed to a hospital. Within hours you were pronounced dead. You had a funeral and everything.”

“That’s probably why he was so secretive with me… and didn’t want me leaving the house… I wasn’t alive to the rest of the world… I didn’t exist… but… I don’t understand why he would do such a thing…”

“You two were together for a long time, he probably just wanted to protect you. That accident might not have been one at all. Maybe just another attempt on your life.”

“What? Another? I… what…”

“I thought you and Suho were married? You’ve been with a crime lord for years, that would certainly put a target on your back.”

“I… so my life… has constantly been in danger…”

“Kinda. Johnny says you two grew up in a pretty rough neighborhood.”

“I grew up with Johnny? Wait, how do you know so much about me? Are we friends too?”

“No, no, it’s not that. Johnny’s just told us a lot about you. The both of you got out together, and he looked after you. He actually used to work for Suho, they were friends and stuff.”

“He worked for Suho?”

“Johnny’s… he’s an assassin, and Suho recruited him a long time ago. From what he’s told us, you didn’t actually know what he did for a living, nor did you know about Suho when you started dating.”

“But I eventually found out… right?”

“I think… Johnny hasn’t told us everything. When he finally has a moment, you guys should talk.”

“Yeah, I have a lot of questions… how long will I be staying here?”

“We’re not sure, taking Suho down won’t be easy.”

“I can imagine. Do you think you can get a message out to Johnny for me?”

“Of course.”

“Tell him I’m okay, and thank him for me. I owe him a lot.”

“I think he owes you, but I’ll relay the message. You should rest, I’ll prepare something for you to eat.”

“That’d be nice.”


End file.
